Speak to me love only speaky spikey spokey
Why is that tear on your cheeky chikey chokey
Give me the answer I seeky sikey sokey
Or I will jump into the creeky crikey crokey
Friday, February 6, 2009
To Market (sweet Betsy from Pike)
To market to market, went my brother Jim, When somebody threw a tomato at him. Now tomatoes are soft, and they don't bruise the skin, But this one killed Jim, it was wrapped in a tin.
Now Mary the milkmaid was milking the cow, The trouble with Mary, she didn't know how. Along came the farmer and gave her the sack, So she turned the cow over and poured the milk back.
I called on my girlfriend, her name was Miss Brown, She was having a bath and she couldn't come down, I said, "Slip on something, you'd better be quick." She slipped on the soap, and oh my was she quick.
I looked out my window too early one morn, And there was a tramp, he was chompin' the lawn. I said, "My young man, if you feel like a snack, The grass is much longer around at the back."
Now Mary the milkmaid was milking the cow, The trouble with Mary, she didn't know how. Along came the farmer and gave her the sack, So she turned the cow over and poured the milk back.
I called on my girlfriend, her name was Miss Brown, She was having a bath and she couldn't come down, I said, "Slip on something, you'd better be quick." She slipped on the soap, and oh my was she quick.
I looked out my window too early one morn, And there was a tramp, he was chompin' the lawn. I said, "My young man, if you feel like a snack, The grass is much longer around at the back."
Old Banjo & Poor old Slave
Old Banjo
I used to play my old banjo
With whiskers on my knee
But now the days have come and gone
And no more used to me
Sing with double ee’s
Sing with ickity
Sing with double ee’s and ickity
Poor Old slave
The poor old slave has gone to rest
We know that he is free
His bones they lie disturb them not
Way down in Tennessee
Add double ee’s
Add iggity agg
I used to play my old banjo
With whiskers on my knee
But now the days have come and gone
And no more used to me
Sing with double ee’s
Sing with ickity
Sing with double ee’s and ickity
Poor Old slave
The poor old slave has gone to rest
We know that he is free
His bones they lie disturb them not
Way down in Tennessee
Add double ee’s
Add iggity agg
Mrs Leary
One dark night
When we were all in bed
Mrs. O'Leary
Left the lantern in the shed
The cow kicked it over and
Winked her eyes and said,
"There’ll be a hot time
In the old town, tonight." Fire Fire Fire!
One night dark
In bed we all were in
Mrs. O'Leary
Left the shed the lantern in
The kick cowed it over and
Eyed her wink and said,
"There’ll be a time hot
In the town old, tonight." Ifer Ifer Ifer!
When we were all in bed
Mrs. O'Leary
Left the lantern in the shed
The cow kicked it over and
Winked her eyes and said,
"There’ll be a hot time
In the old town, tonight." Fire Fire Fire!
One night dark
In bed we all were in
Mrs. O'Leary
Left the shed the lantern in
The kick cowed it over and
Eyed her wink and said,
"There’ll be a time hot
In the town old, tonight." Ifer Ifer Ifer!
John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt
John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt
That’s my name too!
Whenever we go out,
The people always shout
There goes John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt!
Tra la la la la la la la
That’s my name too!
Whenever we go out,
The people always shout
There goes John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt!
Tra la la la la la la la
Billy Boy
Oh, where have you been Billy Boy, Billy Boy
Oh, where have you been, charming Billy
I've been to seek a wife, she's the joy of my life
She's a young thing an' cannot leave her Mother
Did she bid you to come in, Billy Boy, Billy Boy
Did she bid you to come in, charming Billy
Yes, she bade me to come in, there's a dimple in her chin
She's a young thing an' cannot leave her Mother
Did she set for you a chair, Billy Boy, Billy Boy
Did she set for you a chair, charming Billy
Yes, she set for me a chair, she's got ringlets in her hair
She's a young thing an' cannot leave her Mother
Did she take your hat, Billy Boy, Billy Boy?
Did she take your hat, charming Billy?
Yes, she took my hat, and she threw it at the cat.
She's a young thing, and cannot leave her mother.
And is she very tall, Billy Boy, Billy Boy?
And is she very tall, charming Billy?
She's as tall as any pine, and as straight as a pumpkin vine.
She's a young thing, and cannot leave her mother.
Are her eyes very bright, Billy Boy, Billy Boy?
Are her eyes very bright, charming Billy?
Yes, her eyes are very bright, but, alas, they're minus sight.
She's a young thing, and cannot leave her mother.
Can she sing a pretty song, Billy Boy, Billy Boy?
Can she sing a pretty song, charming Billy?
She can sing a pretty song, but she often sings it wrong.
She's a young thing, and cannot leave her mother.
Can she milk a heifer calf, Billy Boy, Billy Boy?
Can she milk a heifer calf, charming Billy?
Yes, she can, and not miss the bucket more than half.
She's a young thing, and cannot leave her mother.
Where does she live, Billy Boy, Billy Boy?
Oh, where does she live charming Billy?
She lives on the hill, forty miles from the mill.
She's a young thing, and cannot leave her mother.
Is she often seen at church, Billy Boy, Billy Boy?
Is she often seen at church, charming Billy?
Yes, she's often seen at church, with a bonnet white as birch.
She's a young thing, and cannot leave her mother.
Can she make a cherry pie, Billy Boy, Billy Boy
Can she make a cherry pie, charming Billy
She can make a cherry pie, quick's a cat can wink her eye
She's a young thing an' cannot leave her Mother
Can she make a feather bed, Billy Boy, Billy Boy?
Can she make a feather bed, charming Billy?
She can make a feather bed, that will rise above your head.
She's a young thing, and cannot leave her mother.
How old is she, Billy Boy, Billy Boy How old is she charming Billy
Three times six, four times seven, twenty eight and eleven
She's a young thing an' cannot leave her Mother
Oh, where have you been, charming Billy
I've been to seek a wife, she's the joy of my life
She's a young thing an' cannot leave her Mother
Did she bid you to come in, Billy Boy, Billy Boy
Did she bid you to come in, charming Billy
Yes, she bade me to come in, there's a dimple in her chin
She's a young thing an' cannot leave her Mother
Did she set for you a chair, Billy Boy, Billy Boy
Did she set for you a chair, charming Billy
Yes, she set for me a chair, she's got ringlets in her hair
She's a young thing an' cannot leave her Mother
Did she take your hat, Billy Boy, Billy Boy?
Did she take your hat, charming Billy?
Yes, she took my hat, and she threw it at the cat.
She's a young thing, and cannot leave her mother.
And is she very tall, Billy Boy, Billy Boy?
And is she very tall, charming Billy?
She's as tall as any pine, and as straight as a pumpkin vine.
She's a young thing, and cannot leave her mother.
Are her eyes very bright, Billy Boy, Billy Boy?
Are her eyes very bright, charming Billy?
Yes, her eyes are very bright, but, alas, they're minus sight.
She's a young thing, and cannot leave her mother.
Can she sing a pretty song, Billy Boy, Billy Boy?
Can she sing a pretty song, charming Billy?
She can sing a pretty song, but she often sings it wrong.
She's a young thing, and cannot leave her mother.
Can she milk a heifer calf, Billy Boy, Billy Boy?
Can she milk a heifer calf, charming Billy?
Yes, she can, and not miss the bucket more than half.
She's a young thing, and cannot leave her mother.
Where does she live, Billy Boy, Billy Boy?
Oh, where does she live charming Billy?
She lives on the hill, forty miles from the mill.
She's a young thing, and cannot leave her mother.
Is she often seen at church, Billy Boy, Billy Boy?
Is she often seen at church, charming Billy?
Yes, she's often seen at church, with a bonnet white as birch.
She's a young thing, and cannot leave her mother.
Can she make a cherry pie, Billy Boy, Billy Boy
Can she make a cherry pie, charming Billy
She can make a cherry pie, quick's a cat can wink her eye
She's a young thing an' cannot leave her Mother
Can she make a feather bed, Billy Boy, Billy Boy?
Can she make a feather bed, charming Billy?
She can make a feather bed, that will rise above your head.
She's a young thing, and cannot leave her mother.
How old is she, Billy Boy, Billy Boy How old is she charming Billy
Three times six, four times seven, twenty eight and eleven
She's a young thing an' cannot leave her Mother
Springtime in the Rockies
It was springtime in the Rockies
And the rain was falling fast
A barefooted tramp with boots on
Came slowly whizzing past
He went round a straight crooked corner
To see a dead donkey die
He took out a pistol to stab him
And shot himself in the eye
And the rain was falling fast
A barefooted tramp with boots on
Came slowly whizzing past
He went round a straight crooked corner
To see a dead donkey die
He took out a pistol to stab him
And shot himself in the eye
Midnight on the Ocean
Twas midnight on the ocean
Not a streetcar was in sight
The sun was shining brightly
It was raining all the night
Twas a summer’s day in winter
And the rain was snowing fast
As the barefoot girl with shoes on
Stood there sitting on the grass
Twas evening and the sunrise
Was just setting in the west
And the fishes in the treetops
Were all cuddled in their nests
As the wind was blowing bubbles
Lighting flashed from left to right
Everything that you could see
Was hidden out of sight
The boats sailed up the highway
For the bridges were all down
And the dogs barked from the rooftops
In that sad and silent town
Twas midnight on the ocean
Not a streetcar was in sight
The sun was shining brightly
It was raining all the night
Not a streetcar was in sight
The sun was shining brightly
It was raining all the night
Twas a summer’s day in winter
And the rain was snowing fast
As the barefoot girl with shoes on
Stood there sitting on the grass
Twas evening and the sunrise
Was just setting in the west
And the fishes in the treetops
Were all cuddled in their nests
As the wind was blowing bubbles
Lighting flashed from left to right
Everything that you could see
Was hidden out of sight
The boats sailed up the highway
For the bridges were all down
And the dogs barked from the rooftops
In that sad and silent town
Twas midnight on the ocean
Not a streetcar was in sight
The sun was shining brightly
It was raining all the night
One Bottle of Pop
One bottle of pop
Two bottle pop
Three bottle pop
Four bottle pop
Five bottle pop
Six bottle pop
Seven seven bottle pop
Don’t throw your junk in my backyard, my backyard, my backyard
Don’t throw your junk in my backyard, my backyard’s full!
Fish and chips and vinegar vinegar vinegar
Fish and chips and vinegar
Pepper pepper, pepper, salt
Two bottle pop
Three bottle pop
Four bottle pop
Five bottle pop
Six bottle pop
Seven seven bottle pop
Don’t throw your junk in my backyard, my backyard, my backyard
Don’t throw your junk in my backyard, my backyard’s full!
Fish and chips and vinegar vinegar vinegar
Fish and chips and vinegar
Pepper pepper, pepper, salt
Man’s life’s a vapor
Man’s life’s a vapor full of woes
He cuts a caper down he goes
Down he down he down he down he down he goes
He cuts a caper down he goes
Down he down he down he down he down he goes
I’m Lovely
My nose is blue my teeth are green
My face is like a soup tureen
I look just like a lima bean
I’m very very lovely
My feet are far too short and long
My hands are left and right and wrong
My voice is like the hippo’s song
I’m very very very very very very lovely (almost spoken)
My face is like a soup tureen
I look just like a lima bean
I’m very very lovely
My feet are far too short and long
My hands are left and right and wrong
My voice is like the hippo’s song
I’m very very very very very very lovely (almost spoken)
Skinamarink
Skinamerink a dink a dink skinamerink a doo
I love you (repeated two times)
Deed I do
I love you in the morning and in the afternoon
I love you in the evening and underneath the moon
Oh skinamarink a dink skinamerink a doo
I love you
O love you changes to I madly and passionately adore you
“ I barely tolerate you
“ I run as fast as I can the minute I see you
“ I wish I understood you
“ I wish I didn’t have to sit next to you
I love you (repeated two times)
Deed I do
I love you in the morning and in the afternoon
I love you in the evening and underneath the moon
Oh skinamarink a dink skinamerink a doo
I love you
O love you changes to I madly and passionately adore you
“ I barely tolerate you
“ I run as fast as I can the minute I see you
“ I wish I understood you
“ I wish I didn’t have to sit next to you
If All Of the Raindrops
1 If all of the raindrops were lemon drops and gum drops
Oh what a rain it would be
I’d stand outside with my mouth open wide
That’s the weather for me oh baby
I wouldn’t care if the sun would never shine
I’d keep on wishing for raindrops all the time
If all of the raindrops were lemon drops and gum drops
Oh what a rain it would be
2. If all of the snowflakes were Hershey bars and milk shakes
Oh what a snow it would be
I’d stand outside with my mouth open wide
That’s the weather for me oh baby
I wouldn’t care if the sun would never shine
I’d keep on wishing for snowflakes all the time
If all of the snowflakes were Hershey bars and milk shakes
Oh what a snow it would be
3. If all of the hailstones were lollipops and snow cones
Oh what a hail it would be
I’d stand outside with my mouth open wide
That’s the weather for me oh baby
I wouldn’t care if the sun would never shine
I’d keep on wishing for hailstones all the time
If all of the hailstones were lollipops and snow cones
Oh what a hail it would be
Oh what a rain it would be
I’d stand outside with my mouth open wide
That’s the weather for me oh baby
I wouldn’t care if the sun would never shine
I’d keep on wishing for raindrops all the time
If all of the raindrops were lemon drops and gum drops
Oh what a rain it would be
2. If all of the snowflakes were Hershey bars and milk shakes
Oh what a snow it would be
I’d stand outside with my mouth open wide
That’s the weather for me oh baby
I wouldn’t care if the sun would never shine
I’d keep on wishing for snowflakes all the time
If all of the snowflakes were Hershey bars and milk shakes
Oh what a snow it would be
3. If all of the hailstones were lollipops and snow cones
Oh what a hail it would be
I’d stand outside with my mouth open wide
That’s the weather for me oh baby
I wouldn’t care if the sun would never shine
I’d keep on wishing for hailstones all the time
If all of the hailstones were lollipops and snow cones
Oh what a hail it would be
My Gal’s a Corker
Chorus
My gal’s a corker, she’s a New Yorker
I’ll buy her anything to keep her in style
1. She’s got a pair of legs just like two whiskey kegs
Hot dog that’s where my money goes
2. She’s got a pair of lips just like potato chips
Hot dog that’s where my money goes
3. She’s got a pair of eyes just like two custard pies
4. She’s got a pair of hips just like two battle ships
5. She’s got a big red nose just like a cabbage rose
6. She’s got a painty chin just like a safety pin
7. She’s got a head of hair just like a grizzly bear
My gal’s a corker, she’s a New Yorker
I’ll buy her anything to keep her in style
1. She’s got a pair of legs just like two whiskey kegs
Hot dog that’s where my money goes
2. She’s got a pair of lips just like potato chips
Hot dog that’s where my money goes
3. She’s got a pair of eyes just like two custard pies
4. She’s got a pair of hips just like two battle ships
5. She’s got a big red nose just like a cabbage rose
6. She’s got a painty chin just like a safety pin
7. She’s got a head of hair just like a grizzly bear
Crooked Man
There was a crooked man,
And he walked a crooked mile,
He found a crooked sixpence
Upon a crooked stile:
He bought a crooked cat,
Which caught a crooked mouse,
And they all lived together
In a crooked little house.
Ah ah oh no don’t let the rain come down (sing 3 times)
My roof’s got a whole in it and I might drown!
And he walked a crooked mile,
He found a crooked sixpence
Upon a crooked stile:
He bought a crooked cat,
Which caught a crooked mouse,
And they all lived together
In a crooked little house.
Ah ah oh no don’t let the rain come down (sing 3 times)
My roof’s got a whole in it and I might drown!
Skinniest Man
The Skinniest Man I ever saw he lived down in Hobokin
If I tell you how skinny he was you’ll say that I’m a jokin
For exercise he used to jump through the holes of a nutmeg grater
He was so skinny that his head looked like a sweet potater
When he went out a walkin he never went alone
For fear some mean old hungry dog would taken him for a bone
One starry night in the pale moonlight when the lamp was burning dimly
A bed bug got him by the seat of his pants and dragged him up the chimney
Oh Me Oh my!
You’d like to laugh to death, he fell through the hole in the seat of his pants
And choked himself to death.
If I tell you how skinny he was you’ll say that I’m a jokin
For exercise he used to jump through the holes of a nutmeg grater
He was so skinny that his head looked like a sweet potater
When he went out a walkin he never went alone
For fear some mean old hungry dog would taken him for a bone
One starry night in the pale moonlight when the lamp was burning dimly
A bed bug got him by the seat of his pants and dragged him up the chimney
Oh Me Oh my!
You’d like to laugh to death, he fell through the hole in the seat of his pants
And choked himself to death.
Sweet Violets
SWEET VIOLETS
There once was a farmer who took a young miss
in back of the barn where he gave her a
Lecture 'bout horses and chickens and eggs.
And told her that she had such beautiful
Manners that suited a girl of her charms.
The girl that he wanted to take in his
Washing and ironing and then if she did,
they would get married and raise lots of
CHORUS
Sweet violets! Sweeter than the roses!
Covered all over from head to toe,
covered all over with sweet violets.
The girl told the farmer that he'd better stop.
She called her father and he called a
Taxi which got there before very long,
for someone was doing her little girl
Right for a change and so that's why he said,
"If you marry her son you're better off
"single, for it's always been my belief
"marriage will bring a man nothing but
CHORUS
The farmer decided to wed anyway
And started in planning for his wedding
Suit which he purchased for only one buck
Then he found out he was just out of
Money and so he was left in the lurch
Standing and waiting in front of the
End of this story which just goes to show
All a girl wants from a man is his
CHORUS
There once was a farmer who took a young miss
in back of the barn where he gave her a
Lecture 'bout horses and chickens and eggs.
And told her that she had such beautiful
Manners that suited a girl of her charms.
The girl that he wanted to take in his
Washing and ironing and then if she did,
they would get married and raise lots of
CHORUS
Sweet violets! Sweeter than the roses!
Covered all over from head to toe,
covered all over with sweet violets.
The girl told the farmer that he'd better stop.
She called her father and he called a
Taxi which got there before very long,
for someone was doing her little girl
Right for a change and so that's why he said,
"If you marry her son you're better off
"single, for it's always been my belief
"marriage will bring a man nothing but
CHORUS
The farmer decided to wed anyway
And started in planning for his wedding
Suit which he purchased for only one buck
Then he found out he was just out of
Money and so he was left in the lurch
Standing and waiting in front of the
End of this story which just goes to show
All a girl wants from a man is his
CHORUS
Gertie
Gertie ate some marmalade, and then she ate some jam,
Gertie ate some luncheon meat and then she ate some spam.
Gertie drank some lemonade and then some gingerale
And Gertie wondered what it was that made her look so pale.
Whoops, went the marmalade and whoops went the jam,
Whoops went the luncheon meat and whoops went the spam,
"Fizz" went the lemonade and "Pop" the gingerale
And Gertie knew just what it was that made her look so pale!
Gertie ate some luncheon meat and then she ate some spam.
Gertie drank some lemonade and then some gingerale
And Gertie wondered what it was that made her look so pale.
Whoops, went the marmalade and whoops went the jam,
Whoops went the luncheon meat and whoops went the spam,
"Fizz" went the lemonade and "Pop" the gingerale
And Gertie knew just what it was that made her look so pale!
Peanut on a Railroad Track
Oh, a peanut sittin' on a railroad track, its heart was all a-flutter. Along came the choo choo train TOOT TOOT! Peanut butter.
A cow walked on the railroad track, the train was coming fast. The train got off the railroad track to let the cow go past!
A hen and a chicken went for a walk just to stretch their legs A motorcar came round the bend TOOT TOOT! Ham and eggs
Oh! the night was dark and dreary the air was full of sleet The old man stood out in the storm his shoes were full of feet
A doctor fell into a well and broke his collarbone. We think that he should tend the sick and leave the well alone.
A farmer slipped on the old barn roof when rotten boards gave way, And as he fell, he shrugged and said, "It's time to hit the hay."
Humpty Dumpty fell right down and landed on his head, So, all the horses and the men had scrambled eggs and bread.
A skinny lady took a bath, without telling a soul, And when she pulled out the plug, she went right down the hole.
Mosquito he fly high, mosquito he fly low, Old man mosquito he lit on me, he ain't a-gonna fly no more.
I went to my girlfriend, a pleasure I was seeking, I missed her lips and kissed her nose, and the gosh darn thing was leaking.
A golf ball sailin' thru the air whizzed by a man a hummin' He heard a caddy holler, "Fore!" an' he thought three more were comin'
When boating, never quarrel for you'll find, without a doubt A boat is not the proper place to have a falling out
"The hot chocolate is exhausted, Sir" the diner was advised Says he, "It's been so weak of late I'm really not surprised"
Said baby tern to mother tern "Can I have a brother" "Yes" said mom to baby tern "One good tern deserves another"
There's a gal up in the hills she's awfully shy and meek She undresses in the dark because the mountains peak
A cow walked on the railroad track, the train was coming fast. The train got off the railroad track to let the cow go past!
A hen and a chicken went for a walk just to stretch their legs A motorcar came round the bend TOOT TOOT! Ham and eggs
Oh! the night was dark and dreary the air was full of sleet The old man stood out in the storm his shoes were full of feet
A doctor fell into a well and broke his collarbone. We think that he should tend the sick and leave the well alone.
A farmer slipped on the old barn roof when rotten boards gave way, And as he fell, he shrugged and said, "It's time to hit the hay."
Humpty Dumpty fell right down and landed on his head, So, all the horses and the men had scrambled eggs and bread.
A skinny lady took a bath, without telling a soul, And when she pulled out the plug, she went right down the hole.
Mosquito he fly high, mosquito he fly low, Old man mosquito he lit on me, he ain't a-gonna fly no more.
I went to my girlfriend, a pleasure I was seeking, I missed her lips and kissed her nose, and the gosh darn thing was leaking.
A golf ball sailin' thru the air whizzed by a man a hummin' He heard a caddy holler, "Fore!" an' he thought three more were comin'
When boating, never quarrel for you'll find, without a doubt A boat is not the proper place to have a falling out
"The hot chocolate is exhausted, Sir" the diner was advised Says he, "It's been so weak of late I'm really not surprised"
Said baby tern to mother tern "Can I have a brother" "Yes" said mom to baby tern "One good tern deserves another"
There's a gal up in the hills she's awfully shy and meek She undresses in the dark because the mountains peak
Oh I wish
Oh I wish I were a little bar of soap
Oh I wish I were a little bar of soap
Oh I'd slippy and I'd slidey over everybody's hidy
Oh I wish I were a little bar of soap
Oh I wish I were a little mosquito
Oh I wish I were a little mosquito
Oh I'd bitty and I'd bitey under everybody's nighty
Oh I wish I were a little mosquito
Oh I wish I were a little English sparrow
Oh I wish I were a little English sparrow
Oh I'd sitty on the steeple and I'd spitty on the people
Oh I wish I were a little English sparrow
Oh I wish I were a little bitty orange
Oh I wish I were a little bitty orange
Oh I'd go squirty squirty squirty over everybody's shirtey
Oh I wish I were a little bitty orange
Oh I wish I were a little bottle of pop
Oh I wish I were a little bottle of pop
Oh I'd go down with a slurp and come up with a burp
Oh I wish I were a little bottle of pop
Oh I wish I were a little hunk of mud
Oh I wish I were a little hunk of mud
Oh I'd ooey and I'd gooey under everybody's shoey
Oh I wish I were a little hunk of mud
Oh I wish I were a little striped skunk
Oh I wish I were a little striped skunk
Oh I'd sit beneath the trees and perfume all the breeze
Oh I wish I were a little striped skunk
Oh I wish I were fishy in the sea
Oh I wish I were fishy in the sea
Oh I'd swim nudey nudey nudey without my bathing suity
Oh I wish I were fishy in the sea
Oh I wish I were a little foreign car
Oh I wish I were a little foreign car
Oh I'd go beepy beepy beepy down everybody's streety
Oh I wish I were a little foreign car
Oh I wish I were a little slippery root
Oh I wish I were a little slippery root
I'd sit upon the trail and knot everyone on his tail
Oh I wish I were a little slippery root
Oh I wish I were a little radio
Oh I wish I were a little radio
I'd go CLICK!
Oh I wish I were a little bar of soap
Oh I'd slippy and I'd slidey over everybody's hidy
Oh I wish I were a little bar of soap
Oh I wish I were a little mosquito
Oh I wish I were a little mosquito
Oh I'd bitty and I'd bitey under everybody's nighty
Oh I wish I were a little mosquito
Oh I wish I were a little English sparrow
Oh I wish I were a little English sparrow
Oh I'd sitty on the steeple and I'd spitty on the people
Oh I wish I were a little English sparrow
Oh I wish I were a little bitty orange
Oh I wish I were a little bitty orange
Oh I'd go squirty squirty squirty over everybody's shirtey
Oh I wish I were a little bitty orange
Oh I wish I were a little bottle of pop
Oh I wish I were a little bottle of pop
Oh I'd go down with a slurp and come up with a burp
Oh I wish I were a little bottle of pop
Oh I wish I were a little hunk of mud
Oh I wish I were a little hunk of mud
Oh I'd ooey and I'd gooey under everybody's shoey
Oh I wish I were a little hunk of mud
Oh I wish I were a little striped skunk
Oh I wish I were a little striped skunk
Oh I'd sit beneath the trees and perfume all the breeze
Oh I wish I were a little striped skunk
Oh I wish I were fishy in the sea
Oh I wish I were fishy in the sea
Oh I'd swim nudey nudey nudey without my bathing suity
Oh I wish I were fishy in the sea
Oh I wish I were a little foreign car
Oh I wish I were a little foreign car
Oh I'd go beepy beepy beepy down everybody's streety
Oh I wish I were a little foreign car
Oh I wish I were a little slippery root
Oh I wish I were a little slippery root
I'd sit upon the trail and knot everyone on his tail
Oh I wish I were a little slippery root
Oh I wish I were a little radio
Oh I wish I were a little radio
I'd go CLICK!
Prune Song
No matter how young a prune may be
He's always full of wrinkles
A baby prune is like his Dad
But he ain’t wrinkled but not quite so bad
We have wrinkles on our face
But a prune has wrinkles all over the place.
No matter how young a prune may be
He’s always full of wrinkles
Same song second verse, a little bit louder and a whole lot worse
Same song third verse, a little bit louder and even worse
(but the last line you sing below)
“He’s always getting stewed”
He's always full of wrinkles
A baby prune is like his Dad
But he ain’t wrinkled but not quite so bad
We have wrinkles on our face
But a prune has wrinkles all over the place.
No matter how young a prune may be
He’s always full of wrinkles
Same song second verse, a little bit louder and a whole lot worse
Same song third verse, a little bit louder and even worse
(but the last line you sing below)
“He’s always getting stewed”
Mrs Murphy's Chowder
Won't ya bring back, won't ya bring back
Mrs. Murphy's chowder.
It was tuneful. Every spoonful
Made ya yodel louder!
After dinner Uncle Ben
Used to fill his fountain pen
From a plate of Mrs. Murphy's chowder.
CHORUS:
There was ice cream, cold cream, benzine, gasoline,
Soup greens, string beans floating all around.
Sponge cake, beef steak, mistake, stomach ache,
Cream puffs, ear muffs, many to be found.
Silk hats, door mats, bed slats, Democrats,
Cow bells, door bells beckon you to dine.
Meat balls, fish balls, moth balls, cannon balls,
Come on in, the chowder's fine.
2) Won't ya bring back, won't ya bring back
Mrs. Murphy's chowder.
From each helping you'll be yelping
For an Alka-seltzer
If they had some where you are
You might find a trolley car
In a plate of Mrs. Murphy's chowder.
(CHORUS)
3) Won't ya bring back, won't ya bring back
Mrs. Murphy's chowder.
You can pack it. You can stack it
All around the larder.
My old horse died the other day.
He disappeared right away
In a plate of Mrs. Murphy's chowder
Mrs. Murphy's chowder.
It was tuneful. Every spoonful
Made ya yodel louder!
After dinner Uncle Ben
Used to fill his fountain pen
From a plate of Mrs. Murphy's chowder.
CHORUS:
There was ice cream, cold cream, benzine, gasoline,
Soup greens, string beans floating all around.
Sponge cake, beef steak, mistake, stomach ache,
Cream puffs, ear muffs, many to be found.
Silk hats, door mats, bed slats, Democrats,
Cow bells, door bells beckon you to dine.
Meat balls, fish balls, moth balls, cannon balls,
Come on in, the chowder's fine.
2) Won't ya bring back, won't ya bring back
Mrs. Murphy's chowder.
From each helping you'll be yelping
For an Alka-seltzer
If they had some where you are
You might find a trolley car
In a plate of Mrs. Murphy's chowder.
(CHORUS)
3) Won't ya bring back, won't ya bring back
Mrs. Murphy's chowder.
You can pack it. You can stack it
All around the larder.
My old horse died the other day.
He disappeared right away
In a plate of Mrs. Murphy's chowder
Michael Finnegan
There was an old man named Michael Finnegan
He had whiskers on his chinnegan
They fell out and then grew in again
Poor old Michael Finnegan
Begin again.
There was an old man named Michael Finnegan
He went fishing with a pinnegan
Caught a fish and dropped it in again
Poor old Michael Finnegan
Begin again.
There was an old man named Michael Finnegan
He grew fat and then grew thin again
Then he died and had to begin again
Poor old Michael Finnegan
Begin again
He had whiskers on his chinnegan
They fell out and then grew in again
Poor old Michael Finnegan
Begin again.
There was an old man named Michael Finnegan
He went fishing with a pinnegan
Caught a fish and dropped it in again
Poor old Michael Finnegan
Begin again.
There was an old man named Michael Finnegan
He grew fat and then grew thin again
Then he died and had to begin again
Poor old Michael Finnegan
Begin again
MacTavish
Oh MacTavish is dead and his brother don’t know
His brother is dead and MacTavish don’t know it
They’re both of them dead and in the same bed
And neither one knows that the other is dead!
His brother is dead and MacTavish don’t know it
They’re both of them dead and in the same bed
And neither one knows that the other is dead!
Limmerick Song
Chorus
Aye-aye-aye-aye,
In China they never grow chilly
So sing me another verse
That's worse than the first verse
Make sure that it's foolish and silly.
A canner exceedingly canny
One morning remarked to his granny,
"A canner can can anything that he can,
But a canner can't can a can, can he?"
A tutor who tooted the flute
Tried to tutor two tooters to toot
Said the two to the tutor,
"Is it tougher to toot
Or to tutor two tooters to toot?"
A certain young fellow named Beebee
Wished to marry a lady named Phoebe
"But," he said, "I must see
What the minister's fee be,
Before Phoebe be Phoebe Beebee."
There was an old man from Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe When he awoke in a fright in the dark of the night He found it was perfectly true
There once was a man from Calcutta Who spoke with a terrible stutter At breakfast he said,
“Give me b b b bread and b b b butter.”
There once was a young fellow of Perth Who was born on the day of his birth He was married they say on his wife’s wedding day And he died when he quitted the earth
A man who was dining at Crewe Found quite a large mouse in his stew Said the waiter, “Don’t shout and waive it about OR the rest will be wanting one too!”
There was a young lady named Lou
who said as the parson withdrew--
"Now the Vicar is quicker,
And thicker, and slicker,
And two inches longer than you
There once was a man from the south of France,
Who spoke with a great deal of arrogance;
'Til head over heel, he slipped on a peel
And crowds gathered 'round as he lost his pants.
There once was a little pet octopus,
Who fell on a plate of asparagus;
It splashed on the chest of a prime dinner guest,
And the owner thought it was hilarious.
There once was a long legged spider,
That lived in a bottle of cider;
Until a lady at afternoon tea,
Drank some now he lives inside of her.
There once was a giant of an elephant,
Who wanted to look cute and elegant;
At a big fashion show, she bought a pink bow,
And now she goes places where others can't.
There once was a grouchy old billygoat,
Who had a big bullfrog stuck in his throat;
When the frog struggled free, the goat screamed with glee,
That he could at last sing the sweetest note.
There was a young lady named Bright
Who traveled much faster than light
She started one day in a relative way
And returned on the previous night
There was an old man from Heath
Who sat on his set of false teeth
Said he, with a start, "Well bless my heart
I've bitten myself underneath"
There's a curious fellow named Ty
Who was baked by mistake in a pie
To the household¹s disgust
He emerged through the crust
And exclaimed with a yawn, 'Where am I?'
There was an old lady from Flynn
Who grew so exceedingly thin
That when she essayed to drink lemonade
She slid down the straw and fell in
There was a nice woman named Anne
Whose limericks never would scan
When told this was so,
She said, "Yes, I know,
But I always try to get as many syllables into the last line as I possibly can."
Aye-aye-aye-aye,
In China they never grow chilly
So sing me another verse
That's worse than the first verse
Make sure that it's foolish and silly.
A canner exceedingly canny
One morning remarked to his granny,
"A canner can can anything that he can,
But a canner can't can a can, can he?"
A tutor who tooted the flute
Tried to tutor two tooters to toot
Said the two to the tutor,
"Is it tougher to toot
Or to tutor two tooters to toot?"
A certain young fellow named Beebee
Wished to marry a lady named Phoebe
"But," he said, "I must see
What the minister's fee be,
Before Phoebe be Phoebe Beebee."
There was an old man from Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe When he awoke in a fright in the dark of the night He found it was perfectly true
There once was a man from Calcutta Who spoke with a terrible stutter At breakfast he said,
“Give me b b b bread and b b b butter.”
There once was a young fellow of Perth Who was born on the day of his birth He was married they say on his wife’s wedding day And he died when he quitted the earth
A man who was dining at Crewe Found quite a large mouse in his stew Said the waiter, “Don’t shout and waive it about OR the rest will be wanting one too!”
There was a young lady named Lou
who said as the parson withdrew--
"Now the Vicar is quicker,
And thicker, and slicker,
And two inches longer than you
There once was a man from the south of France,
Who spoke with a great deal of arrogance;
'Til head over heel, he slipped on a peel
And crowds gathered 'round as he lost his pants.
There once was a little pet octopus,
Who fell on a plate of asparagus;
It splashed on the chest of a prime dinner guest,
And the owner thought it was hilarious.
There once was a long legged spider,
That lived in a bottle of cider;
Until a lady at afternoon tea,
Drank some now he lives inside of her.
There once was a giant of an elephant,
Who wanted to look cute and elegant;
At a big fashion show, she bought a pink bow,
And now she goes places where others can't.
There once was a grouchy old billygoat,
Who had a big bullfrog stuck in his throat;
When the frog struggled free, the goat screamed with glee,
That he could at last sing the sweetest note.
There was a young lady named Bright
Who traveled much faster than light
She started one day in a relative way
And returned on the previous night
There was an old man from Heath
Who sat on his set of false teeth
Said he, with a start, "Well bless my heart
I've bitten myself underneath"
There's a curious fellow named Ty
Who was baked by mistake in a pie
To the household¹s disgust
He emerged through the crust
And exclaimed with a yawn, 'Where am I?'
There was an old lady from Flynn
Who grew so exceedingly thin
That when she essayed to drink lemonade
She slid down the straw and fell in
There was a nice woman named Anne
Whose limericks never would scan
When told this was so,
She said, "Yes, I know,
But I always try to get as many syllables into the last line as I possibly can."
I'm a Nut
I'm a little coconut
sitting on my coco-bum
everybody steps on me
just to see how cracked I'll be
(chorus)
I'm a nut BOOM-BOOM
I'm a nut BOOM-BOOM
I'm a nut I'm a nut I'm crazy
I'm an old pile of tin
no one knows what shape I'm in
Got four wheels and a running board
I'm a Chevy not Ford!
Chorus
I'm a little acorn round, Lying on the cold cold ground, Somebody came and stepped on me,
That is why I'm cracked you see,
Pepsi Cola came to town
Coca-Cola shot him down
Dr. Pepper fixed him up
Now we all drink 7UP
Chorus
7UP caught the flu
now we all drink Mountain Dew
Mountain Dew caught it too
now we don't know what to do
sitting on my coco-bum
everybody steps on me
just to see how cracked I'll be
(chorus)
I'm a nut BOOM-BOOM
I'm a nut BOOM-BOOM
I'm a nut I'm a nut I'm crazy
I'm an old pile of tin
no one knows what shape I'm in
Got four wheels and a running board
I'm a Chevy not Ford!
Chorus
I'm a little acorn round, Lying on the cold cold ground, Somebody came and stepped on me,
That is why I'm cracked you see,
Pepsi Cola came to town
Coca-Cola shot him down
Dr. Pepper fixed him up
Now we all drink 7UP
Chorus
7UP caught the flu
now we all drink Mountain Dew
Mountain Dew caught it too
now we don't know what to do
The Movies
I went to the movies tomorrow
I took a front seat in the back
I fell from the floor to the balcony
And broke a front bone in my back
I said to the lady behind me
I cannot see over your hat
I phoned for a taxi and walked it
And that’s why I never came back
I took a front seat in the back
I fell from the floor to the balcony
And broke a front bone in my back
I said to the lady behind me
I cannot see over your hat
I phoned for a taxi and walked it
And that’s why I never came back
God Bless
God bless my under wear, my only pair
Stand beside them and guide them
Through the wash and the wear and the tear.
Through the washer and the dryer
Or the clothesline, back to me
Oh, God bless my underwear, my only pair
God bless my underwear, my only pair.
Stand beside them and guide them
Through the wash and the wear and the tear.
Through the washer and the dryer
Or the clothesline, back to me
Oh, God bless my underwear, my only pair
God bless my underwear, my only pair.
Ging Gang Gooli
Ging gang gooli gooli gooli gooli wat cha
Ging gang goo, ging gang goo
Ging gang gooli gooli gooli gooli wat cha
Ging gang goo, ging gang goo
Hayla, hayla shayla,
Hayla shayla hayla hoo
Hayla, hayla shayla,
Hayla shayla hayla hoo
Shallywally
shallywally
shallywally
shallywally
Oompa oompa oompa oompa
(Split: Group 1 sings Oompas
Group 2 sings Ging Gang
Ging gang goo, ging gang goo
Ging gang gooli gooli gooli gooli wat cha
Ging gang goo, ging gang goo
Hayla, hayla shayla,
Hayla shayla hayla hoo
Hayla, hayla shayla,
Hayla shayla hayla hoo
Shallywally
shallywally
shallywally
shallywally
Oompa oompa oompa oompa
(Split: Group 1 sings Oompas
Group 2 sings Ging Gang
Down by the Bay
Down by the bay where the watermelons grow
Back to my home I dare not go
For if I do my mother will say
"Did you ever see a bear in pink underwear
Down by the bay?"
Down by the bay where the watermelons grow
Back to my home I dare not go
For if I do my mother will say
"Did you ever see a bee with a sunburned knee
Down by the bay?"
"Did you ever see a moose kissing a goose
"Did you ever see a whale with a polka dot tail
"Did you ever see a llama, wearing a pajama?"
"Did you ever see a fly, wearing a bow-tie?"
"Did you ever see a rhino fighting a dino?"
"Did you ever see a goat riding in a boat?"
"Did you ever see a gator with a polka-dot potater?"
"Did you ever see a pig dancin a jig'?"
“Did you ever see a cow with a green eyebrow?”
“Did you ever see a bear, without any hair?”
“Did you ever see a bird, speaking a word?”
“Did you ever see a bug, drinking from a mug?”
“Did you ever see a cat, wearing a hat?”
“Did you ever see a dog dancing with a frog?”
“Did you ever see a flower taking a shower?”
“Did you ever see a Fox, carrying a box?”
“Did you ever see a goose drinking apple juice?”
“Did you ever see a hog walking a dog?”
"Did you ever see a horse riding in a Porsche?”
“Did you ever see a moose with a loose front tooth?”
“Did you ever see a mouse, sweeping out her house?”
“Did you ever see a plant eating an ant?”
“Did you ever see a quail, missing his tail?”
“Did you ever see a snake baking a cake?”
“Did you ever see a toad running in the road?”
“Did you ever see a turtle, wearing a girdle?”
“Did you ever see a witch digging a ditch?”
“Did you ever see an oak wearing a cloak?”
“Did you ever see Earth shaking with mirth?”
“Did you ever see rats wearing silk hats?”
“Did you ever have a time when you couldn't make a rhyme?”
This doggone's song gone on too long!
Back to my home I dare not go
For if I do my mother will say
"Did you ever see a bear in pink underwear
Down by the bay?"
Down by the bay where the watermelons grow
Back to my home I dare not go
For if I do my mother will say
"Did you ever see a bee with a sunburned knee
Down by the bay?"
"Did you ever see a moose kissing a goose
"Did you ever see a whale with a polka dot tail
"Did you ever see a llama, wearing a pajama?"
"Did you ever see a fly, wearing a bow-tie?"
"Did you ever see a rhino fighting a dino?"
"Did you ever see a goat riding in a boat?"
"Did you ever see a gator with a polka-dot potater?"
"Did you ever see a pig dancin a jig'?"
“Did you ever see a cow with a green eyebrow?”
“Did you ever see a bear, without any hair?”
“Did you ever see a bird, speaking a word?”
“Did you ever see a bug, drinking from a mug?”
“Did you ever see a cat, wearing a hat?”
“Did you ever see a dog dancing with a frog?”
“Did you ever see a flower taking a shower?”
“Did you ever see a Fox, carrying a box?”
“Did you ever see a goose drinking apple juice?”
“Did you ever see a hog walking a dog?”
"Did you ever see a horse riding in a Porsche?”
“Did you ever see a moose with a loose front tooth?”
“Did you ever see a mouse, sweeping out her house?”
“Did you ever see a plant eating an ant?”
“Did you ever see a quail, missing his tail?”
“Did you ever see a snake baking a cake?”
“Did you ever see a toad running in the road?”
“Did you ever see a turtle, wearing a girdle?”
“Did you ever see a witch digging a ditch?”
“Did you ever see an oak wearing a cloak?”
“Did you ever see Earth shaking with mirth?”
“Did you ever see rats wearing silk hats?”
“Did you ever have a time when you couldn't make a rhyme?”
This doggone's song gone on too long!
Do your ears hang low
Do your ears hang low?
Do they wobble to and fro?
Can you tie them in a knot?
Can you tie them in a bow?
Can you throw them o'er your shoulder
Like a Continental Soldier?
Do your ears hang low?
Do your ears hang high?
Do they reach up to the sky?
Do they wrinkle when they're wet?
Do they straighten when they're dry?
Can you wave them at your neighbor
With an element of flavor?
Do your ears hang high?
Do your ears hang wide?
Do they flap from side to side?
Do they wave in the breeze
From the slightest little sneeze?
Can you soar above the nation
With a feeling of elevation?
Do your ears hang wide?
Do your ears fall off
When you sneeze or when you cough?
Do they wind up in the trough?
When you’re slopping up the hogs,
Can you stick them in your pocket
Just like Davy Crocket?
Do your ears fall off?
Do your ears flip-flop?
Can you use them for a mop?
Are they stringy at the bottom?
Are they curly at the top?
Can you use them for a swatter?
Can you use them for a blotter?
Do your ears flip-flop?
Do your ears stick out?
Do they nearly reach your snout?
Can you squish them farther in?
Can you push them farther out?
Do they hang out there?
Just a floppin’ in the air?
Do your ears stick out?
Do your ears hang askew?
Can you use one stirring stew,
While the other’s picking berries,
Or making mountain dew?
Can you hold an elevator, while you signal to a waiter?
Do your ears hang askew?
Do your eyeballs droop?
Do they wobble in your soup?
Do they browse like a snoop?
Or hide behind a hoop?
Do they linger like a loop?
Or fall down when you stoop?
Do your eyeballs droop?
Do your eyes bug out?
Do they roll around your snout?
Do you go cross-eyed, when you’re looking for a trout?
Can you see your image clearer, without looking in the mirror?
Do your eyes bug out?
Does your nose hang down?
Does it drag upon the ground?
Does it come alert like a hound
Or bounce up at every sound?
Does it stick up like a mound?
Or is it barely found?
Does your nose hang down?
Do they wobble to and fro?
Can you tie them in a knot?
Can you tie them in a bow?
Can you throw them o'er your shoulder
Like a Continental Soldier?
Do your ears hang low?
Do your ears hang high?
Do they reach up to the sky?
Do they wrinkle when they're wet?
Do they straighten when they're dry?
Can you wave them at your neighbor
With an element of flavor?
Do your ears hang high?
Do your ears hang wide?
Do they flap from side to side?
Do they wave in the breeze
From the slightest little sneeze?
Can you soar above the nation
With a feeling of elevation?
Do your ears hang wide?
Do your ears fall off
When you sneeze or when you cough?
Do they wind up in the trough?
When you’re slopping up the hogs,
Can you stick them in your pocket
Just like Davy Crocket?
Do your ears fall off?
Do your ears flip-flop?
Can you use them for a mop?
Are they stringy at the bottom?
Are they curly at the top?
Can you use them for a swatter?
Can you use them for a blotter?
Do your ears flip-flop?
Do your ears stick out?
Do they nearly reach your snout?
Can you squish them farther in?
Can you push them farther out?
Do they hang out there?
Just a floppin’ in the air?
Do your ears stick out?
Do your ears hang askew?
Can you use one stirring stew,
While the other’s picking berries,
Or making mountain dew?
Can you hold an elevator, while you signal to a waiter?
Do your ears hang askew?
Do your eyeballs droop?
Do they wobble in your soup?
Do they browse like a snoop?
Or hide behind a hoop?
Do they linger like a loop?
Or fall down when you stoop?
Do your eyeballs droop?
Do your eyes bug out?
Do they roll around your snout?
Do you go cross-eyed, when you’re looking for a trout?
Can you see your image clearer, without looking in the mirror?
Do your eyes bug out?
Does your nose hang down?
Does it drag upon the ground?
Does it come alert like a hound
Or bounce up at every sound?
Does it stick up like a mound?
Or is it barely found?
Does your nose hang down?
Did you ever
Horse Fly
(Tune:"The More We Get Together")
Did you ever see a horse fly, a horse fly, a horse fly?
Did you ever see a horse fly, a horse fly, fly, fly?
Did you ever see a board walk, a board walk, a board walk?
Did you ever see a board walk, a board walk, walk, walk?
• Shoe lace
• Hair pin
• Tooth pick
• Eye drop
• Neck tie
• Moth bawl
• Eye lash
• Yard stick
• Ear drum
• Clam bake
(Tune:"The More We Get Together")
Did you ever see a horse fly, a horse fly, a horse fly?
Did you ever see a horse fly, a horse fly, fly, fly?
Did you ever see a board walk, a board walk, a board walk?
Did you ever see a board walk, a board walk, walk, walk?
• Shoe lace
• Hair pin
• Tooth pick
• Eye drop
• Neck tie
• Moth bawl
• Eye lash
• Yard stick
• Ear drum
• Clam bake
Boom! Boom! Ain't it Great to Be Crazy
CHORUS:
Boom! Boom! Ain't it great to be crazy?
Boom! Boom! Ain't it great to be crazy?
Silly and foolish all day long.
Boom! Boom! Ain't it great to be crazy!
A horse and a flea and three blind mice
Sat on a curbstone shooting dice
The horse he slipped and fell on the flea
"Whoops," said the flea, "There's a horsie on me!
Way down south where bananas grow
A mouse stepped on an elephant's toe
The elephant cried, with tears in his eyes,
Why don't you pick on someone your own size?
CHORUS
Way up north where there's ice and snow
There lived a penguin by the name of Joe
He got so tired of black and white
He wore pink pajamas to the party last night!
CHORUS
A man bought a pair of combination underwear
Guaranteed not to rip or tear
He wore it nine months without exaggeration
He couldn't get it off 'cuz he forgot the combination!
CHORUS
Eli, Eli had some socks
A dollar a pair and a nickel a box
The more you wear 'em the better they get
And you put 'em in the water and they don't get wet!
Called myself on the telephone
Just to hear that golden tone
Asked myself out for a date
Said be ready 'bout half-past eight!
Took myself to the picture show
Sat myself on the very last row
Wrapped my arms around my waist
Got so fresh I slapped my face!
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy?
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy?
Silly and Foolish all day long
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy!
Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear,
And Fuzzy Wuzzy cut his hair.
So, Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't fuzzy.
No, by Jove, he wasn't, was he?
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy?
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy?
Silly and Foolish all day long
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy!
I take a swim in my swimming pool.
I jump from the board 'cause that's the rule.
I hit my head on cement and mortar.
Forgot to look - there was no water.
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy?
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy?
Silly and Foolish all day long
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy!
That one-eared cat who used to sit
Watching Grandma rock and knit
Swallowed a ball of bright red yarn,
And out came kittens with red sweaters on.
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy?
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy?
Silly and Foolish all day long
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy!
Once I had a little dog and all she ate was cans And when those puppies came they came in Ford sedans!
When Mary had a little lamb the doctor was surprised
When Old Mac Donald had a farm the doctor nearly died!
Boom! Boom! Ain't it great to be crazy?
Boom! Boom! Ain't it great to be crazy?
Silly and foolish all day long.
Boom! Boom! Ain't it great to be crazy!
A horse and a flea and three blind mice
Sat on a curbstone shooting dice
The horse he slipped and fell on the flea
"Whoops," said the flea, "There's a horsie on me!
Way down south where bananas grow
A mouse stepped on an elephant's toe
The elephant cried, with tears in his eyes,
Why don't you pick on someone your own size?
CHORUS
Way up north where there's ice and snow
There lived a penguin by the name of Joe
He got so tired of black and white
He wore pink pajamas to the party last night!
CHORUS
A man bought a pair of combination underwear
Guaranteed not to rip or tear
He wore it nine months without exaggeration
He couldn't get it off 'cuz he forgot the combination!
CHORUS
Eli, Eli had some socks
A dollar a pair and a nickel a box
The more you wear 'em the better they get
And you put 'em in the water and they don't get wet!
Called myself on the telephone
Just to hear that golden tone
Asked myself out for a date
Said be ready 'bout half-past eight!
Took myself to the picture show
Sat myself on the very last row
Wrapped my arms around my waist
Got so fresh I slapped my face!
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy?
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy?
Silly and Foolish all day long
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy!
Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear,
And Fuzzy Wuzzy cut his hair.
So, Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't fuzzy.
No, by Jove, he wasn't, was he?
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy?
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy?
Silly and Foolish all day long
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy!
I take a swim in my swimming pool.
I jump from the board 'cause that's the rule.
I hit my head on cement and mortar.
Forgot to look - there was no water.
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy?
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy?
Silly and Foolish all day long
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy!
That one-eared cat who used to sit
Watching Grandma rock and knit
Swallowed a ball of bright red yarn,
And out came kittens with red sweaters on.
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy?
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy?
Silly and Foolish all day long
Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy!
Once I had a little dog and all she ate was cans And when those puppies came they came in Ford sedans!
When Mary had a little lamb the doctor was surprised
When Old Mac Donald had a farm the doctor nearly died!
Boogie Woogie Washerwoman
Boogie-Woogie Washer Woman
Down in the jungle where nobody goes
There's a boogie woogie washer woman washin' her clothes
with a scrub-a-dub here and a scrub-a-dub there
A boogie woogie washer woman washin' her hair!
Oops biddly otten botten wotten, OOOh!
Oops biddly otten botten wotten, OOOh!
Oops biddly otten botten wotten, OOOh!
A boogie, woogie, washer woman washing her hair
Yes, Sir!
Down in the jungle where nobody goes
There's a boogie woogie washer woman washin' her clothes
with a scrub-a-dub here and a scrub-a-dub there
A boogie woogie washer woman washin' her hair!
Oops biddly otten botten wotten, OOOh!
Oops biddly otten botten wotten, OOOh!
Oops biddly otten botten wotten, OOOh!
A boogie, woogie, washer woman washing her hair
Yes, Sir!
It Ain't gona rain no more
Chorus
Oh, it ain't gonna rain no more, no more
It ain't gonna rain no more
How in the heck can I wash around my neck
if it ain't gonna rain no more
A bum sat by the sewer
And by the sewer he died
And at the coroners inquest
They called it 'sewer side'
My father is a butcher
My mother is a cook
And I'm the little hot-dog
With the candy that I took
My father built a chimney
He built it up so high
He had to take it down each night
To let the moon go by.
My daddy is a doctor,
My mommy is a nurse,
And I'm the little needle
That gets you where it hurts.
Oh I had a cat and I named him Tom
Let him out one day
A big dog chased him down the street
And Tom cat ran away
Tom came back big and fat
How that cat did purr
Now how on earth could Tom give birth
I guess that ‘he’s” a her!
Made a garden on my roof
Weeded every day
Prayed for rain but when it came
It washed my roof away
Oh it ain’t gona rain no more no more
Oh it ain’t gona rain no more
How in the deuce can I cook my goose
When it ain’t gona rain no more?
An apple sat on the railroad track, feeling very cross
Along came the 5:15; Toot! Toot! Applesauce!
CHORUS
Miss Lucy had a tugboat, the tugboat had a bell.
Miss Lucy went to heaven, but the tugboat went "Toot! Toot!"
CHORUS
Mary had a little lamb, her father shot it dead,
And now she brings it to school between two hunks of bread!
CHORUS
Some say fleas are black, but I know that ain't so,
'Cuz Mary had a little lamb whose fleas were white as snow!
CHORUS
Oh, it ain't gonna rain no more, no more
It ain't gonna rain no more
How in the heck can I wash around my neck
if it ain't gonna rain no more
A bum sat by the sewer
And by the sewer he died
And at the coroners inquest
They called it 'sewer side'
My father is a butcher
My mother is a cook
And I'm the little hot-dog
With the candy that I took
My father built a chimney
He built it up so high
He had to take it down each night
To let the moon go by.
My daddy is a doctor,
My mommy is a nurse,
And I'm the little needle
That gets you where it hurts.
Oh I had a cat and I named him Tom
Let him out one day
A big dog chased him down the street
And Tom cat ran away
Tom came back big and fat
How that cat did purr
Now how on earth could Tom give birth
I guess that ‘he’s” a her!
Made a garden on my roof
Weeded every day
Prayed for rain but when it came
It washed my roof away
Oh it ain’t gona rain no more no more
Oh it ain’t gona rain no more
How in the deuce can I cook my goose
When it ain’t gona rain no more?
An apple sat on the railroad track, feeling very cross
Along came the 5:15; Toot! Toot! Applesauce!
CHORUS
Miss Lucy had a tugboat, the tugboat had a bell.
Miss Lucy went to heaven, but the tugboat went "Toot! Toot!"
CHORUS
Mary had a little lamb, her father shot it dead,
And now she brings it to school between two hunks of bread!
CHORUS
Some say fleas are black, but I know that ain't so,
'Cuz Mary had a little lamb whose fleas were white as snow!
CHORUS
Agdalena, Magdalena
Agdalena, Magdalena, Hootentimer, Potentimer
Hogan, Logan, Pogan was her name.
She had twenty hairs on the top of her head
Ten were alive and ten were dead. Refrain
She had two eyes in her head
one was green and the other was red. Refrain
She had two teeth in her mouth
one pointed north and the other pointed south. Refrain
Her nose was so long so when she sneezed
It got caught in between her knees.
Her ears stuck out like the sails of a boat
Her Adam’s apple wandered up and down her throat.
She had a nose as long as a hose
It curled at the end and was red like a rose
She had two hands on the ends of her arms
One rang bells and the other rang charms!
She had two knees in the middle of her legs,
One liked bacon and the other liked eggs!
Her feet were flat as bathroom mats
I forgot to ask how they got like that.
Those two feet were sized forty-four and a half,
One took a shower and the other took a bath!
She loved to polish her fingernails
She bought her polish in ten gallon pails.
Her head was made out of solid oak
The language that she spoke was an awful joke
A ten-ton truck hit poor Magdalena The old truck driver had to get a new machina!
She had two kids just the other day
They took one look and had to run away!
Agdalena, Magdalena, Hootentimer, Potentimer
Hogan, Logan, Pogan was her name.
She had twenty hairs on the top of her head
Ten were alive and ten were dead. Refrain
She had two eyes in her head
one was green and the other was red. Refrain
She had two teeth in her mouth
one pointed north and the other pointed south. Refrain
Her nose was so long so when she sneezed
It got caught in between her knees.
Her ears stuck out like the sails of a boat
Her Adam’s apple wandered up and down her throat.
She had a nose as long as a hose
It curled at the end and was red like a rose
She had two hands on the ends of her arms
One rang bells and the other rang charms!
She had two knees in the middle of her legs,
One liked bacon and the other liked eggs!
Her feet were flat as bathroom mats
I forgot to ask how they got like that.
Those two feet were sized forty-four and a half,
One took a shower and the other took a bath!
She loved to polish her fingernails
She bought her polish in ten gallon pails.
Her head was made out of solid oak
The language that she spoke was an awful joke
A ten-ton truck hit poor Magdalena The old truck driver had to get a new machina!
She had two kids just the other day
They took one look and had to run away!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)